Anyway I really want to share some dreams with you. Now before you click onto your next blog and never visit this one again, I have to tell you this isn't one of those silly "lets analyze my dreams and figure my life out" blogs. Its just something to expose you to the juiciness that is my life.
I don't know if it's the percocet or the loritab or the sleep deprivation, but my dreams have been totally cracked out lately.
1. Two people I work with got married for no apparent reason after I had been gone for a week.
2. Lindsay Lohan was my friend and roommate and let me borrow her dresses for a party. She was really nice in the dream because she had just gotten out of rehab. And she had the prettiest dresses and she's not even a bitch at all like everyone says she is. She was her good old Parent Trap self again.
3. I was a hooker in a bar. When I say hooker, I mean bartender. And I was wearing ripped up tights and cut off jeans shorts. It was icky. And by icky I mean dead sexy.
4. I gave birth to a baby who was already talking. And the baby was telling me everything I was doing wrong and told me to get an education and stop dreaming about the Peace Corps because the Peace Corps isn't even a legit institution. And come on guys, how can you even argue with a talking baby? You can't! You just can't argue with a talking baby.
5. Robert Deniro was my lover and we lived in a warehouse in some Asian city. It was a cool renovated warehouse and decorated with awesome modern furniture that was all oddly shaped. And spotlights everywhere. Did I mention Robert DeNiro was my lover! I mean, weird! He's got that mole and everything. I just can't get down with that. Even though is is kind of a sex machine from what I hear. Rowr.
How can anyone ever want to wake up with dreams like these? Well, because the kids need new shoes thats why. And someone has to bring home the veggie bacon.
No comments:
Post a Comment